Culture Shock ~ Germany

So, I’ve realized that a lot of the troubles I’ve had settling-in are due to the pressure I was putting on myself to learn German and to establish a decent level of comfort in our new home and lives.

Firstly, the German courses just got me wayyy too overloaded. I was spending at least 6 hours a day on German and loosing track of all the things I enjoy. I’ve also been alone a lot and am trying to figure out how to calm my mind.

As well, since we arrived I was really struggling to establish the doctor network I/we need... I must say, not speaking German is a considerable roadblock. Now, I’m dealing with poor bedside manner and German straightforwardness COMBINED! Yikes!! It’s ongoing and I’m still looking for options.

And unfortunately I’ve had the misfortune of witnessing Frankfurt’s underbelly. I found it quite nasty. I’m still trying to shake certain awful images.

Less nastily but still upsetting is the rule-following that limits overall flexibility. That is, yes, rules are good but not if it means you can’t be flexible about them! Let me explain. Walk on the right: generally a good “rule-of-thumb”. I was recently on the left side of a park path walking towards someone else who was also walking on the on the left side. So not in each others’ way at all. The local realized the erroneous situation, quickly strode over to the “correct” side of the path (the right) and expected me to reciprocate. Because I didn’t, we almost crashed into each other except for the fact that I moved at the last second. I mean: COME ON! It’s a park… and nobody would have noticed “the error” but him!!! This was a small example. A more significant example: Not making eye contact for fear of making a “personal connection”: Walking in Munich, I got “T-boned” by a local who then proceeded to yell loudly and angrily in my ear (imagine a T-bone scenario…) and then kicked me in my leg as she tried to walk through me. The following week when I told the story to my German teacher with hopes to remediate whatever I’d been doing wrong as a pedestrian in Germany and to understand the cultural differences i.e. the “WHY?” she said “Well, to me, that’s just funny”. And that was the end of that. Since then, I have come to my own conclusions for the “WHY?” But mostly, that Germans don’t have thumbs and if they do, their rules may be pretty opposable.

It was all just too much. And combined, contributed to my overall state of crappiness.....

So now I'm finished my classes and have a pile of hours more in my day. :) I'm still doing German, but on my own time (on the computer). I hope with a break, things will percolate a bit; I can be happy about the move again and get back to doing the things I've neglected. PHEW!! I know that I've done the right thing for me.

The other thing that has been stressing me out is wedding planning!!! Well, all I can say is that getting married in Germany is not going to happen. I tell you, for two months I was in contact with people here in Germany and it was really tiring and HARD!! For example, everything must be translated into German and then notarized. 1 page starts at 75 Euros then is 1.25 per additional word. All documents need to be notarized (at an additional cost per…) and since we don’t speak German, we’d need an interpreter to help us say “I do”. This would obviously cost about 800 Euros a word. Oh, and I must mention that one of the required documents is a long form birth certificate no older than 4 months old ~ you know, since it changes on a regular basis…

Gurrrrrr…. okay, that’s my culture shock moan in a nutshell!